Thinking Out Loud

2012-01-12T14:58:00.002-05:00

7 ways to strengthen your will power

The power of your will is the energy that gives you the ability to make choices. Most people live their lives out of habit; they do not use their will to make conscious choices.

Do you want something different in your life? Do you struggle with having the will power to make a change?

Why do you want to make this change? Imagine how you will look, feel, and sound when this change happens. Imagining this can be a great motivator to generate your will. Remembering your motivation can give your will a direction, and help you make choices that support your intention.

Here are seven practices to help increase your will:

1.    Maintain a compassionate attitude toward self. Critical self judgment and guilt weaken your will. Missteps and slips are a natural part of the process of change. Be forgiving with yourself while you are learning to strengthen your will.

2.      Suspend negative self talk and negative attitudes. Be open to the possibility that you can be successful. Stop being cynical. Never give up.

3.     Laugh. Laughter will help you strengthen your will.

4.     When you are highly tempted to “give in” to a behavior (for instance eating chocolate) imagine yourself having the experience of eating the chocolate. Imagine how you feel after you have finished eating. Now do you still want the chocolate?

5.     Cravings usually pass after 20 minutes. Make a choice to distract yourself for 20 minutes until it passes.

6.     Eat a balanced diet to keep your blood sugar stable. Will needs mental energy to function; unstable blood sugar deprives you of the energy needed to use your will effectively.

7.     Sleep and rest. When you are tired it is difficult to activate your will. You are prone to want a quick fix when your energy is low. Aim for 6-8 hours of sleep a night.

Practice making conscious choices rather than following habitual patterns. Learn to relax, meditate, and move your body in ways you find fun. Having a calm, centered, peaceful frame of mind will allow you to receive the energy needed to strengthen your will.

Registration now open for new Kabbalsitic Healing Class: For a psycho/spiritual approach to healing.

Is your relationship breaking up? 4 steps to heal emotional pain

2011-10-20T19:56:00.000-04:00

One of the big issues that brings people into psychotherapy is emotional pain. The emotional pain caused by the ending of a relationship is particularly common.

Here are four steps that will help you to heal from emotional pain.

1. Acceptance: You often resist what “is” especially when you are in pain. Letting go of the “if onlies” (if only he/she would call me, change, give me another chance and so on) will help you get unstuck from a merry go round of pain. Letting go of what you wish would happen and accepting what is happening is the first step. Recognize that you do not have control.

2. Feel your feelings and express them in ways that feel safe. Talk with friends, a therapist, your rabbi, priest or spiritual advisor, or get a journal write your feelings down. Expressing your feelings and thoughts will help you organize and understand what you are experiencing. This will bring you release and relief.

3. Be: Once you do the first steps you will begin to feel better. Breathe, relax and nurture yourself. Have compassion for yourself and provide experiences that are comforting and nurturing. (Take a nap, exercise; take a bath, lunch with a friend and so on).

4. Take action: Now it is time to literally move on. Take a bike ride, go for a walk, join a class, or start hobby. Get involved in your life.

When you are experiencing emotional distress you often relive trauma from the past, or feel that you will be overwhelmed by the emotions in the present.

Instead you can understand this experience provides a tremendous opportunity for healing. Follow these steps and you can move through the pain with a new perspective and a better attitude.

Interested in learning more? Visit my web site http://www.debrajoygoldman.com/ for free articles about relationships, dreams, spirituality, personal growth and more.

*as seen on examiner.com

Kabbalistic Healing Class

2011-10-10T09:46:00.000-04:00

As a psychotherapist, student, and teacher of Kabbalah for over 20 years I have been studying how spirituality and psychotherapy intersect and interact. As a result, I am excited to offer this class which will provide psychological healing utilizing Kabbalistic principals.

In this class you will learn about The Tree of Life, a map of the universe and of your psyche. "Know thy self" is one of the important tasks for Kabbalistic healing. Enlightenment comes from studying yourself, understanding how your psyche functions, and why you feel and act the way you do. You can gain mastery over yourself by finding balance, being mindful, living in the moment, and making conscious choices. You will improve your physical, mental, and spiritual health. Kabbalistic healing will benefit your life and relationships (including your relationship with yourself).

In this six week course you will:

1. Gain a framework and map of the universe and yourself. This will deepen your awareness and understanding of the spiritual practices you have already developed.

2. Understand and experience The Tree of Life, a map that guides you in the evolution of your soul.

3. Develop and expand your awareness of yourself, your relationships, and your life.

4. Develop and reconnect to a practice of awakening and remembering.

5. Explore your state of being. Learn how to harmonize areas of discord in yourself and your life, both on a spiritual and mundane level.

For more information about dates, times, fees, and how you can participate, call Debra Joy Goldman at 561-602-8041.

Tough time in your marriage? 7 helpful tips

2011-08-19T08:55:00.000-04:00

Are you angry with your spouse? Are there ongoing issues that try your patience, compassion and love? You may want your marriage to work, but are out of ideas of how to fix the issues. I have been providing marriage counseling for over twenty five years and have put together these helpful tips:

1. Communicate. There are different ways you can communicate. Talk honestly about what is happening. Each of you can share what you are experiencing. If talking doesn’t work, write letters or get a licensed therapist to facilitate a dialogue. Even if it is hard to communicate keep on trying.

2. Create a vision of the solution. If you made a video tape of how your marriage would look when your issues are resolved, what would be on the tape? How would you and your partner feel, what would you being doing and saying to each other? What would be different?

3. Express your authentic feelings, how you truly feel. To the best of your ability, listen to your partner’s feelings with an open mind and a lot of love. You may be surprised to find you both have similar feelings.

4. You may both want the same things, peace of mind, to be loved, appreciated, supported and respected. When I listen to couples fight, underneath the anger and stories I hear hurt and a longing to be accepted and loved. When you fall in love you often feel “now I have a safe place, someone who will be there for me, and support me”. When this does not happen, you feel disappointed and need to blame someone. To some extent, these unspoken expectations are there for everyone.

5. Work together. You can work together and share the journey as you move in an agreed upon direction. Continue to communicate and share your vision for the relationship. This is an ongoing process. Keep practicing.

6. Instead of looking at your partner’s behavior, look at yourself. What are you doing to block what you want in the relationship? Change your behavior.

7. Learn how to move past disappointment. Everyone will at some point in your relationship, disappoint you, (not live up to your expectations). We are only human. After experiencing disappointment, learn how to repair the martial connection and continue on the road towards your vision (what you saw on the video tape).

Make the commitment to work through the tough times. Having a partner who works towards a shared vision can bring many rewards. Having a companion who shares the tough times, as well as the good, is all part of marriage.

THE GOOD NEWS: Your marriage will often be stronger after you work thorugh the tough times.

*as seen on examiner.com

Does it feel like you and your spouse live in different worlds?

2011-08-19T06:15:00.000-04:00

In a study reported in the book Rapt by Winifred Gallagher couples were given a checklist of events and activities and asked to mark ones that had occurred during the course of the week. The list included items like fights, lovemaking, issues with children and so on. The data revealed the percentage of agreement between husbands and wives was at the level of mere chance. Your spouse is experiencing an entirely different world from you!

How does this happen? Your experience of the world depends on where your attention is focused. We all have selective attention. What you focus on is what you will remember.

What determines what you pay attention to? Attention is determined by many factors, both conscious and unconscious. Each one of us is unique. Your past, your beliefs about the world and your self all influence what you focus on. This creates an individualized experience of the world.

For example if you get a new hybrid car, all of a sudden there seems to be many hybrid cars on the road. Your attention is now focused on noticing these hybrids cars. Before you bought one you never paid attention in this way and did not notice as many hybrids.

How can you benefit from this knowledge? Realize how important communication is for your relationship. Without communication, sharing your feelings, perceptions, and thoughts you lose the connection with your partner. You stay in your separate worlds.

Learn how to communicate with your partner, pay attention to them and listen to what and how they have experienced the world. Invite them into your world and be willing to enter theirs. Neither view is objectively “right”.

Communication will increase intimacy and satisfaction in your relationship and it just might expand your world.

How does your marriage affect your health?

2009-08-03T08:33:00.000-04:00

How does your marriage affect your health?
When you marry your lifestyle habits become more alike. The November 2008 issue of Psychology Today presents research showing marital relationships steer our physical well being. Researchers are finding that spouses influence each others eating habits, doctor visits, use of alcohol, cigarettes and marijuana.

Couples can even develop the same illness over time the Yale School of Public Health did a study over four years of over 6,000 people. Results showed that in every single behavior there was spousal effect. For example if one spouse quit smoking the other was 6-8 times more likely to quit. If one quit drinking alcohol the other was five times more likely to quit. The one exception to this is exercise. Here there was an effect, but it was milder.
The good news: one of the best ways to change your spouse is to change yourself.

Nagging does not work and in fact can have the opposite effect. So look to yourself, and " clean up your side of the road", your spouse may follow. You may be pleasantly surprises what happens when you stop trying to "help" them change. Instead focus your attention on getting your own habits on track.

Three Steps To Change

2009-07-06T15:11:00.000-04:00

Let’s say you have decided to make a change. You have recognized that you have a pattern or habit pattern that you want to pay attention to. So you have recognized something, you have choices. Congratulations!

Here is an example:

You may have found yourself following a habitual pattern or perspective on a situation in your life and you do not like it. You have yourself thinking self critical thoughts, measuring yourself against others, and coming up short. Thinking to yourself what a failure or burden you are, or that you are undeserving of love.

You ask “How can I change this?”
Here are three steps to take. Do an experiment, try this for 3 days.

• Awareness: Become aware of the signs that the pattern is present. Clues:
Thoughts and feelings.

• Acknowledge: Do the work to understand and explore yourself, so in the moment of awareness you can remember what is happening.

• Correct it: What is the change? What is the new choice? For example I deserve and receive love. See it, feel it, think it. Create a momentary, in the present, experience of this feeling. You may have a memory of something you experienced in you life that already gives you this experience.

Now follow these three steps through out the day. Practice this for three days. Pay attention to what happens. What inspires you, what dreams you dream, what is happening? Is anything different?
Perhaps you would like to continue this experiment a few more days and continue to pay attention.

Favorite Self- Talk

2009-06-01T08:59:00.000-04:00

Here is my favorite self talk (self talk = things you think to yourself)

I AM HERE

If you like that thought, try this:

On a piece of paper write in large letters:

YOU ARE HERE

Hang this up where you see it often.

These tips will help bring you back into the present moment. Try it, and see what you experience.

In my esoteric studies of the hebrew letters I understood this about I am here:

This is what Moses was saying at the burning bush.

I am Here

I am present in a High place, a mountain, where I hear the still small voice.
A place I hear divine revelation. I breathe out.

The present.

Goals: Three Ways They Sabatoge Success

2009-04-30T07:48:00.000-04:00

You might be thinking, WHAT, how can having a goal possibly sabotage me?

1.When you set a goal it is something you hope will happen in the future.The future has not occurred yet.You have no control over the future.

2. The goal you set might or might not happen. This future oriented focus puts pressure on you. It is an end point you are trying to get to and this pressure will sabotage the outcome.

3. Setting a goal puts an expectation in your mind. If what is happening does not match your expectation you feel discouraged, angry, and disappointed. You need to blame someone or something. Often you blame yourself.

So what can you do? Not set goals? Then how do you create changes in your life?

Here is what you can do. Set an intention. An intention is present oriented. It means in this moment you are putting your focus, your attention, and your will in the direction that you are aiming for. You can focus on the intention right now.

For example say your intention is to get a job. Right now, in this moment, you are putting yourself in the direction of a job.
Right now, in this moment, you act according to that intention by making a call.
All of this is happening here and now and you have the power to make a choice now to act accordingly to that intention.
You can focus on the power of now by making choices that support the intention. This gives you power, because you have a choice each moment. Your actions take place in the present moment.

As you focus on your intention, you can make choices aligned with this. If you do not make the call today, you can refocus on the intention later and act.

Staying in the now helps. You have choices in the now. The future does not exist yet and what will happen out of your hands. You influence the future through the now, by the choices you make each moment..

Set an intention and conceptualize that this means all your attention will be focused in this direction today, the outcome, what happens in the future, will be what it will be.

Thoughts Become Things

2009-04-03T18:47:00.000-04:00

How do you create?

First understand the basics of the creative processes. Causation comes from the divine. Another words, what this means to you... what is the spark or impulse of the first stirring in consciousness of the answer to this question, What Do You Want?

Believe it or not most people do not know the answer to this question. Let us say what you want is a successful business. Initially you experience this as a spark of energy, an idea. What happens then? You begin to have thoughts and images of what that will be like. These thoughts and images spur feelings. You may feel anything from excitement and motivation, to fear and paralysis, or some combination. Depending on which of these thoughts and feelings are happening you begin to make choices. The choices are the concrete actions (or in action) that you do in your everyday life. Do you pick up the phone and make the phone call. Or do you put it out of your mind. If you want to lose weight, do you take that walk this morning, or make some excuse to yourself.

So what is going on from the divine spark of the idea, to the thinking, and imaging, to the emotional response and finally the choices you make?

As the initial divine impulse comes into being it channels through you. You have a set of patterns and beliefs, kind of like programming. This comes from both your life experience and from the meaning and responses that you bring to these life events. As the spark of divine light comes into being through you it begins to fragment, to split. Some Energy gets trapped, held or in some way diverted from the original intention. You may begin to de-rail your actions by how you think and feel about what is happening. Bottom line you are not moving towards what you intended. It is not happening, or perhaps something is happening but not what you intend.
This is the opportunity for you to become conscious of the thoughts and images, these create the feelings which provide the fuel for the choices in this world of action.

What fuel are you giving your self? Are your thoughts an unending stream of critical negative self talk, are fears and anxieties paralyzing you, stopping you from fully participating in life.

Keep going back to the original intention you started with. Follow the process:

Emanation Spark of direction. Flash of Inspiration. Make sure you have an understanding of what you are truly seeking.

Thoughts, beliefs, Images then begin after the initial spark.

Feelings: the fuel for the next step

Actions. Actual physical doing, what choices you make in your everyday life.

Working with a therapist can help you to make changes. Therapy can teach you how to develop tools to unlock places in your life you feel stuck.

Three Things You Can Do Today To Increase Your Happiness

2009-03-04T08:03:00.000-05:00

Do you understand what gives you happiness? How do you describe happiness? It is not the giggling, jump up and down feeling. The definition agreed upon today involves feeling satisfied, content, and fulfilled.

What do you think would make you happy today? Most likely your answer is something like money, house, car or something that bring a momentary feeling of happiness.The happiness would fade as the novelty of the desired thing wore off. You are adaptable and the money, house, new car or accomplishments will decline to give you happiness. You will feel something is missing and want something else.

So what can you do? Living a meaningful life, utilizing your gifts and your time, and living with thought and purpose will help.

Here are three things to start today.

1. Gratitude: Tell someone every day that you are grateful to them, or write it in a letter or email. At the end of the day make a list of gratitude’s in that day. If something challenging has happened see if you can turn it around and find something to be grateful for in the situation.

2. Find ways to be kind to others, especially if you can do it anonymously.

3. Savor your life. Learn how to be mindful using all your senses fully in each moment. Mindfulness is a relaxed state of awareness of the present moment. You feel a curiosity and openness to life and others. You let go of judgments. This allows you appreciate what is present in your life now. It helps you become less adapted to what you have in your life now.

Are you ready to begin today? Try an experiment and do these three things for the next week. Check in with yourself and see if your happiness isn’t increasing, do you feel more content and satisfied? If your answer is yes then continue to remember these three steps and practice them daily.

Are You Experiencing a Spiritual Bypass?

2009-02-01T07:56:00.000-05:00

Are you pursuing a spiritual path? Have you found yourself disappointed or frustrated? Either with the people or the outcome? Are you ready to give up?

Here is what I think is happening. There has been a great deal of interest in pursuing mystical, esoteric, spiritual mysteries. People have been jumping the band wagon of spiritual pursuit, both traditional practices and “commercialized” versions of enlightenment. What I am suggesting is that one needs psychological healing in psychotherapy before spiritual work is effective.

What is a spiritual bypass then? It is when you are not recovered from your psychological wounding,and you become involved in a spiritual pursuit in order to heal. Thinking this is “the answer" to everything that has been bothering you. The outcome often is feeling let down, one loses faith and trust.

The ability to trust, have faith and have discipline to practice true spiritual pursuits requires one to have a balanced psychological foundation. Without this you are bypassing work and jumping to spirit to find peace and balance. You have no foundation to support this work and it will collapse.

Here is one example of how this might happen. Early psychological wounding (first year of life) can result in an impaired ability to form healthy attachments. The wounding to early consciousness needs to be repaired in order to provide a balanced, solid foundation. Someone wounded in this way will attach to the people and practices of a spiritual tradition in a dysfunctional way. They might want to be controlled (taken care of), becoming dependant on, or becoming so disappointed by the humanness of their companions, that they reject all.

Do yourself a favor. Heal yourself in the emotional and mental realms first. Do not try to climb the ladder to the divine, until the lower rungs of your ladder have been repaired.

First make sure the basics in your life are handled. You have a secure home and way of maintaining your day to day living. Then heal your psyche.

Seek a therapist or group to work through any wounds, patterns, or beliefs that are destructive.Counseling can help you discern what is truely healthy for you. Now when you begin your spiritual journey, you are prepared to respond to the wonderful fulfillment as well as the disappointments, and frustrations along the way.

Are Your Feelings Getting You Into Trouble?

2008-12-19T06:53:00.000-05:00

When my youngest son was four years old he decided he wanted to stay home alone while I picked up his brother and sister from school. HE WAS ANGRY, and said "I am not going". I said he was not old enough to stay alone and needed to come with me.

He ran behind the couch and I could see this was going to become a large battle. I said to him “I understand you are angry and you do not want to come. You can feel as angry as you want, but you still need to come with me". Then I took his hand and led him to car. For the first few minutes of the ride he sat with a scowl on his face,and his arms crossed. At one point he kicked the dash board. I said, "no kicking, you can feel angry but you can not kick".

A song came on we liked and before long his arms were uncrossed, and he was through his anger.

The feelings you have are valid, it is when you act out this feeling in a destructive way that trouble comes. You have choices how to act on the feeling. Feelings provide fuel to your actions. When your actions are propelled by anger, you often act impulsively without thinking things through, or out of revenge to hurt others back. Try this: feel the feeling, and then slow down before you act. You can choose what action to take, rather then act on impulse.

Feelings of fear often paralyze action. In this case confront you fears, by first talking about them and finding what you are afraid of. Break the action into smaller steps. Just take the first step. Gain confidence and courage with each step you make.

Think about putting the feeling into words. If you tend to act your feelings out, this is probably causing problems in your relationships.

For more about this and other informative topics visit my web site http://debrajoygoldman.com/

The Money Flow

2008-11-29T05:59:00.000-05:00

Are you worried about paying your bills? Have you or your partner been laid off or lost your job? Here is a story that could help you to think differently about money.

One of the spiritual principals about money is that the more you hold on to it, the less you have flowing in. By allowing money to flow out to pay your bills, you allow room for more to flow in. Now if you are worried about money you might feel inclined to hold on tight to the money you have. When bill paying time comes you feel reluctant to pay out what money you do have for fear there will be no more coming in. Feel familiar?

About ten years ago I was experiencing those exact feelings. It was holiday time, my husband was job hunting and the bills were due. We had the money to pay them, but once paid, the bank balance would be too low for my comfort. Since I understand and attempt to live by the principal of flow, I was trying to get comfortable with paying the bills. The fear was making it tough to act.

So, I go to the Green market, a weekly market of local fresh vegetables, flowers, etc. I bought a basket and put the change (many one dollar bills) into my coat pocket. I missed the pocket and the money landed on the ground. At that moment the wind came up and blew the dollars into the air. They scattered in all directions. At first I started to chase the money. Then I stopped and started laughing. There was no way I could catch the money. I surrendered and laughed. As I stood there laughing, others began to catch my money and return it to me. Before long, all my money was brought back to me. Someone on the side lines watching said "That's why we call it the Green Market".

So the lesson, when I surrender and let money go (laughing) it was all flowing back to me. I immediately got the analogy and went home and paid the bills. Now if I can simply remember this when the fear returns, I will live in the money flow. Try it and see what happens.

For free downloads and articles visit www.debrajoygoldman.com

Simplify Your Life; Divest Yourself of What has Little Value for That of True Value.

2008-11-02T07:06:00.000-05:00

You have so much stuff! Are you continually amazed at how it grows?

Our last two moves were from larger homes to smaller ones. Each time I purged so much “stuff”. When I get motivated to organize and sort there is still more stuff to get rid of. A few years ago I was in one of these cleaning out moods. A friend was selling things on e-bay and I thought I would let go of some of the stuff I still had from my wedding (at that time 25 years ago). I found in the dark recesses of the kitchen cabinets a beautiful tray. I had never parted with it because each time I cleaned out I thought it was too pretty to let go. I looked at the tray and wondered when the last time it had seen the light of day. I realized that I would rather let it go, clear out the space, and use the money for something I would enjoy. And use today. Some one else would use the tray and be happy with it.

I was amazed during this process the attachment that I felt for something that I had not thought about or seen for a long time. Why was I keeping it, moving it from place to place with me all this time? Whatever attachment it has to me or me to it, I wanted to let go. By letting go of stuff, you can let go symbolically of the things that enslave you.

Stuff enslaves you. So many times people talk with me about all the stuff they have. How it creates chaos and mess. You need to take care of it, sometimes spend money to rent storage space for it. It takes energy to have stuff; it pulls on you all the time. It speaks to you silently, “take care of me, and use me, keep me”.

My experience when I clean out the stuff and let it go is that something opens in my life.
Divest yourself of stuff and fill your life with what is of value to you in this moment. Free yourself and transform your life into one filled with joy of using, and taking care of, and appreciating what you have. Keep only what you truly value or use. Simplify your life.
For free downloads and articles visit www.debrajoygoldman.com

When Bad Things Happen

2008-10-03T07:19:00.000-04:00

I still remember the phone call. It was 3:00am in the morning on a Sunday in 1999.
The police were on the phone. "Some one broke into your office and set fire to it, get here as quickly as you can".

A few days before I had called my landlord to tell him I was going to lease the space for another two years. Now it was pretty much a total loss. Have you had a shock like this in your life? Did you feel angry, scared, confused? I asked, "Why is this happening, how could this happen, what do I do now"? Are these the kinds of questions that go through your mind when bad things happen to you?

If you want to make the best of a bad situation, then find the good. What do I mean? I suggest you evaluate what is happening.The word evaluate has the meaning of "find the value in".What was of value in my office burning up? At first it was hard to understand how this could hold any value.

What the fire did was move me into a new space, which changed my practice. I am a psychotherapist. The building I was in was filled with people in the healing profession. There were other psychotherapists, massage therapists, chiropractors etc. I moved into an executive suite with insurance, real estate, and financial planners. A totally different atmosphere. The direction of my work changed. This led me to where I am today. This is of value to me. The fire gave me a push that was needed to propel change into my life.

So what value you can find in your "bad"? Find it, evaluate what is happening. You will find that this is the fastest way to peace of mind and happiness. Now you just have to DO IT.

For more ideas and tools to keep on making changes visit my web site at http://debrajoygoldman.com/

You Can Stop Giving Your Old Beliefs Power

2008-09-05T09:38:00.000-04:00

You can stop giving your old beliefs power

As a child I discovered that on days with events I was looking forward to happily, time would drag by slowly until the event. On a day that I had a doctors appointment at the end of the day (which I hated) the day would breeze quickly by, and we would be heading to the doctor. I would not want time to go so quick, how could that be? It was my attitude that was different not the flow of time. It changed my experience of time.

It’s not life but the attitude you bring to life that creates your experience.

Another words what you think, what you tell yourself, what you picture in your mind, how you direct your thoughts in your imagination, your words, and internal dialogue directly relates to how you feel and experience your life.

You may also notice that thoughts are attached to feelings. The times you have something pleasant planned in the future and think of it, you feel pleasurable feelings. You could give yourself that feeling when ever you want, simply by imaging the activity.

Sometimes you might notice that certain thoughts you think are habitual, For example: you often worry about paying the bills, thinking about how much they will be and if there will be enough money to pay them. You feel fearful. These thoughts and feelings have most likely been happening for a lot of years. You have gotten by and managed. Is fear and worry the feeling you want to live with around money? Does the fear and the worry lead to the choices about money that you want to be making? Are you shaking your head NO?
This is what you can do:

Here are three steps to take. Do an experiment, try this for 3 days.

Awareness: Become aware of the signs that the pattern is present. Clues: thoughts and feelings.
Acknowledge: Do the work to understand and explore yourself, so in the moment of awareness you can remember what is happening.
Correct it: What is the change? What is the new choice? See it, feel it, think it. Create a momentary, in the present, experience of this feeling. You may have a memory of something you experienced in you life that already gives you this experience.

Now follow these three steps through out the day. Practice this for three days. Pay attention to what happens. What inspires you, what are your night dreams, what is happening? Is anything different?

Here is correction about money.

1. Sit with your feet flat on the ground, hands palm down in your lap. Eyes closed breathe out through your mouth long slow breathe, as if you are blowing out candles on a birthday cake. Then breathe in through your nose, short and easy. Does this breathe a total of three times? As you are breathing think to your self this is your new perspective on money exercise.

2. See, sense, and feel that you are up high looking down on a river flowing, know that there is always ongoing eternal flow. Feel the peace and settling down. Breathe put through your mouth and open your eyes.

Habitually thoughts come back and need to be noticed, acknowledged and corrected again.

You can learn to respond to what is happening outside in the experiential world with a fluid corrective internal response in the inner world. This helps you stay connected to peace and balance.

Try this for three days, do an experiment. Notice what’s different. May be you would like to continue. Go right ahead. Enjoy!

2008-08-15T17:01:00.000-04:00

Become Your Own Authority

My Husband used to come home and say"they say"... this about the weather, or what you should eat. I began to ask who are "they" that we follow so easily?

You get millions of messages from the outside about how to act, what to eat, what to weigh, how to behave in relationships, and more. Messages come daily from TV, newspapers, books, friends, family and others. They give you standards to live by that are often false.

I recommend finding your inner authority, it gives you millions of messages too. It can give instantaneous answers, changes in perspective, power, and beauty. The still small voice that is the your inner authority.

Create an inner temple in your imagination where you can go to listen to, and converse with your inner authority.

1.First sit in a comfortable chair with you feet flat on the ground, your hands separate in your lap palms down. Close your eyes and breathe out through your mouth as if you are blowing out candles on a cake, a long slow full breathe out. Then breathe in normally through your nose. Do this breathe two more times (for a total of three breathes), long , slow full.

2. Now see and sense yourself inside a temple. This is an inner temple, a place you feel centered,connected and receptive. Take into the temple all the information from the outside that has your attention and bring it to this inner room and consider what is of value. Discard the rest.

3. See and know yourself leaving this temple with what is of value to you. Sense what is different.

4. Breathe out through your mouth and open your eyes.

Now you are living from your own inner authority. You are revivified, integrated, and balanced. You feel self aware, intuitive and can respond instead of react.

All of this can be done through one of the true languages of the heart, Imagery. When you combine your will with your emotion, the image becomes a vehicle to connect from the inside out. The creative process, the inner vision made manifest. Enjoy the journey!
To learn more about this and for free downloads and articles visit my web site at www.debrajoygoldman.com

Posted by Debra Joy Goldman at 3:40 AM
Labels: Become Your Own Authority

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Become Your Own Authority

About Me

Debra Joy Goldman
I've worked as a counselor and educator for the past 20 years in the South Florida area. I specialize in marriage counseling and couples therapy, individual psychotherapy, facilitating women's group therapy and groups about imagination, dreams, and developing healthy lifestyles. I hold a Master's Degree in Counseling from Nova University and I am licensed since 1990 by the State of Florida as a Mental Health Counselor. I've continued my post-graduate training with a certification from the American Institute for Mental Imagery. I have a private practice in North Palm Beach where I work with individuals, groups, and couples. You can lean more by visiting my website at www.debrajoygoldman.com. Considering therapy? For a free 15-minute consultation call me at 561-844-1340. I look forward to hearing from you. View my complete profile